I spent the bulk of yesterday sewing while I waited for the phone call from my PNP. Not only did I finish the little dog’s coat but I had enough fleece to make her a second coat. The first coat is a double layer, warmer coat. The second coat is a single layer, with a thick fleece for those cool spring days. I am delighted with how they came out. I love the flower print and the blue will look fantastic on the little dog’s white fur . Her gotcha day is the 27th, so I will have pics of her in the coats then.
The Phone Call(s)
When my PNP finally got a hold of me, she had a lot to say. She had talked to my Primary Physician and my doctor had charged my PNP and I to researching inpatient/residential eating disorder facilities. I am kind of curious as how it fell to my PNP to be the one to help me with the research, however, I am fine with it. I adore my PNP and I know she will do a good job helping me.
I had dug out the letter and business card of my Blue Cross case manager (yup, I have one) and after I talked to my PNP, I called my case manager. She was incredibly helpful and kind. (I feel kind of embarrassed calling a total stranger and telling her I have an eating disorder and I need help finding more intensive treatment.) She did some legwork on her part and verified my insurance coverage for such care. It turns out I have damn good insurance and as long as I stay “in network” I have 100% coverage and no copay/deductible for both inpatient and residential treatment! This is such a relief to me because with me completely out of work right now, and me having spent the last year minimally working, we kind of have no money. Not having to pay anything out of pocket for treatment is a blessing.
My Case Manager sent me a list of in network facilities, most of them within driving distance of my home. I started cranking my way through the list and alternated feelings of panic, despair and relief as I investigated them. It was exhausting. 😦
I also forwarded the list to my PNP and I sent her an email later with my current top choices. I need more info about all of them, so I will have to spend some time contacting places and getting my questions answered. At the end of the week, my Case Manager is calling me back to see if I need more choices and to see how I am doing with the process.
I had a kind of anxiety/panic melt-down after contacting my Case Manager and I sent a panicked email to the AT asking if I could come see him today so we can talk about all of this. I see him later this morning. I did feel calmer last evening, but then last night, the dogs woke me up at 2 and I was feeling stressed and anxious and could not fall back asleep. Finally after an hour and a half, I took a lorazepam and then settled down pretty quickly and fell back asleep.
So…I am stressed and overwhelmed, full of questions (I have a huge list of questions to take to the AT) and honestly, a little bit relieved that I have some treatment options. I don’t know how close I am to my doc putting her foot down and saying it is time for the higher lever of treatment…But at least I will be prepared if/when it happens.